Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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