I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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