It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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