I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
ugly people sure do ruin things
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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