But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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