just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
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