I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
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He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
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Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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