Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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