we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I'm too high and old for this...
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
