you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
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Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
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If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
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