guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
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I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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