so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
He felt like a one man threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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