Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
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How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
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I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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