508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
