dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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