garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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