he puts the penis in happiness.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
You're a waste of cheezeits
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
