The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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