Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Do you still have your period?
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
