I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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