Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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