He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
