Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
there's paper in my vomit.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
