oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
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