That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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