Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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