try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
