My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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