I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Sacagawea was the original milf.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
These tits shall not be calmed
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize