I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Randomize
