i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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