champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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