Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
