i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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