He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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