Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
