Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize
