I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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