I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
