He is such a slut. More and more my type.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
