I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
