Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
