So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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