my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Randomize