I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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