honey bunches of taint.
Sober January is a disaster.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize