WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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