good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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