Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize