She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
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She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
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I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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