his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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