My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Couch. On fire.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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